Being a Woman: A crime or a Mistake?

Several times, I've been left wondering if being a woman is a crime or a mistake. I've heard and seen some people argue that women were not in God's original plan, that we were created because of man's need for companionship. I don't know the arguments that the atheists have in this line.

Women are shamed daily, both for their positive and negative actions. I've been thinking, recently and I've come to realize that we live in a patriarchal world and no matter how hard we try, women will always be at the receiving end, bear all the blames and shame and live with them till death.

If a man grows rich overnight, owning landed properties and cars, throwing money around; he's hailed and celebrated for being a man. But, if a woman lives comfortably, wears nice clothes and drives a car; she must have slept with men to get those, she must have got it from the back door. Even their fellow women say worse things about. Woe betide her if she's still single.  You all know what happened to Linda Ikeji.

If a young woman dates an older man (sugar-daddy, aristo), no one asks what the man has to do with a girl young enough to be his daughter. Everyone asks; what is she doing with that man old enough to be her father? If a young boy dates a woman much older than he is, everyone asks why she's wasting the life of a boy young enough to be her son. No one thinks vice versa. She's termed a disgrace to womanhood.

If a man loses his wife, life goes on for him, after her burial. He may even pick a new bride from the burial, that's cool. But if a woman loses her husband, she must mourn him for at least, one year. This depends on the custom of the place, anyway. It may even be longer. She wears sackcloth, or something similar. It is even a taboo for her to seen around men. People even begin to question her innocence in her husband's death. Prospective suitors in cases of young widows, are advised to enquire about the cause of her husband's death. It's really bad.

Have you ever seen a divorced woman being scorned? Nobody wants to know if she divorced or was divorced. It becomes a huge turnoff for men. Who wants to eat crumbs from another man's table? Is it the same case for men? Your guess is as good as mine

If a woman is raped, she's blamed. She bears both the psychological damage from the rape and the stigmatization. Nobody blames the rapist, they were provoked to act.

She's a prostitute! She's a whore! Who patronizes her? You shame the women and leave the men. Who does that?

If a woman gives birth out of wedlock, she not the father of her child is blamed. She should have closed her legs. She should have used preventive drugs. She should have been more careful. But, the same people will be the first to crucify her if they find contraceptives in her possession. They will curse her for having an abortion. I do not support immorality, but I propose that both parties to a moral offense be punished equally. That is equality.

The next time you look at a 35 year old woman and wonder why she's still single, make sure you've thought same of a single 40 year old man.

Before you call my opinion myopic, make sure that you have yours and it is more reasonable than mine.

We are women! We are beautiful, awesome, strong, intelligent, hard working and powerful!